The Don Sez: Unforgiven 1999
Steve Austin promised a new WWF champion. I promised an Unforgiven rant. We're both going to fufill our obligations, except mine won't end with a Stunner.
Note: I got the times of the matches from Scott Keith at 411, but the opinions are ALL MINE, baby.
Things to keep in mind:
~McMahon won the WWF Title two Smackdowns before, and vacated it right after
~The refs are on strike
~Rock and Sock are going strong
~Big Show's a heel, Kane's a face
~This is the final PPV Vince Russo booked for the company. You'll see that with some of the booking.
Taped from the Charlotte Coliseum
Commentators: JR and the King
Val Venis vs. Steve Blackman
Val stole Blackman's bag of tricks and replaced some of them with vibrators to set this match up. Gotta love Russo. Short match designed to get the crowd into it, and it worked somewhat. Blackman controls with various martial arts, but Val is able to make the babyface comeback and nails the Money Shot for the pin at 6:30. No blatant blown spots, but Blackman had no real charisma until he hit the Hardcore division a year later. ** Postmatch antics see Blackman lay Val out with the kendo stick, and EMTs (including one that looked like former flavor-of-the-month BB) are called out by Steve Lombardi to help. Blackman mouths off, and Jim Dotson spears the shit out of Blackman. Best move of the match.
European Title: Mark Henry (c) vs. D-Lo Brown
Henry gets bitch-slapped by Lilian Garcia prior to the match and tries to duck out claming a "braineurism". I swear to god, I'm not making that up. D-Lo inducts Mizark into the Sky High Hall of Fame early, but Henry's able to kick out. From there, it's your typical Mark Henry heel match - clotheslines, slams, and the occasional press slam that damn near drops D-Lo on his head. D-Lo hits a sick-looking rana that the Hurricane would swipe on Raw a few months ago, and counters corner punches with another trip to the Sky High Hall of Fame. Lo-Down that looked more like a headbutt gives D-Lo the strap at 9:12. *, D-Lo was off his game a little bit. And Mark Henry isn't the guy you want carrying you.
Intercontinental Title - Jeff Jarrett (c) vs. Chyna
Chyna goes to work early, but Jarrett slips out and posts her the hard way. Chyna sells it like a MAN, appropriately enough. Jarrett nails a cross-body for two, but takes a NASTY electric chair drop from Chyna. Big ups to Jarrett for being professional about this, gimmick notwithstanding. Sleeper is escaped in the typical fashion, and they trade powerbombs. Jeff got his last and goes for the Figure 4 - but Chyna boots him to the floor. CUE OVERBOOKING!! Chyna blasts Jarrett with a chair on the floor and goes for the Pedigree, but Jeff slingshots Chyna into ref du jour Harvey Wippleman (hey, at least he's experienced). Moolah and Mae Young ooze in and punch Jarrett around for a bit, but he fights the dinos off and goes for the guitar. Debra grabs the axe and kabongs Jarrett for the three count. HOWEVER... HSR (Head Scab Ref) Tom Pritchard hits the ring, and one instant replay later, we have a Dusty Finish at 12:42. I really, REALLY hate that finish, so it's a * deduction. Bringing the match to *1/2. Pritchard gets the shit kicked out of him afterwards.
Dudley Boyz vs. Acolytes
Hey, it's Stuttering Bubba! "Are they ma-ma-making fun of me?" And the Dudz have the tie dye on! It's an Acolytes/Dudleyz match, so I'm fighting the urge to go to the Gameboy. Thankfully, the urge jobs at 4:39 after a double arm whip. As for the match itself, Bubba takes command early and actually hits the Senton That Doth Never Hit, but makes the mistake of tagging D-Von in and he bumps for Farooq for a while. The Acolytes (and Lawler) kept bringing up the Public Enemy during this match (RIP Rocco). Bubba gets the tag and the Dudz hit a sidewalk neckbreaker that JR miscalls as the 3D, and they hit the 3D for real just after. But the hand of VR strikes, as Stevie Richards (with a UPN logo on his chest) Stevie Kicks D-Von to give the Acolytes the win at 7:14. Crowd didn't care at ALL, and the run-in didn't help much. 3/4
Hardcore Rules, Women's Title - Ivory (c) vs. Luna
Because when you think of hardcore women, you think of Ivory and Luna. Uh huh. Right. Anyway, this match is basically three minutes of two women bouncing off every nailed-down object in sight. Cute spot with the Xerox - King: "Don't they usually do that with the butt?" - but it leads nowhere, as did everything else. Tori's run-in attempt with a lead pipe fails, and Ivory gets the pin at 3:38 that I've lost forever. DUD.
WWF Tag Team Titles - New Age Outlaws (c) vs. E&C
Before the ladder matches, five-second poses, and conchairtos, there was Edge and Christian, two Canadians who popped the females and came in through the crowd. This, to the best of my knowledge, is the first time they've had a tag title shot on a PPV. Road Dogg quickly assumes Ricky Morton duties as E&C get to show off the skillz that made them seven-time tag champs. Cool spot du jour - a sidewalk slam-reverse DDT combo. The Road Dogg's back was injured by Jericho, and that's what the boys focus on, but Road Dogg counters a double-team into a double DDT and hot-tags Billy as the place goes batshit. Typical tag team brawl erupts, but the Hardy Boys hit the ring and take out E&C, leading to a FameAsser on Edge and a succesful defense for the Outlaws at 11:05. Again, what's with the pointless runins... oh, wait, Russo's booking. I should've expected it. ***. This would set up the LADDER MATCH the next month at No Mercy.
Hardcore Title Match, Kennel from Hell - Al Snow (c) vs. Big Bossman
Oh lord, this match. I though Bossman was the champ coming in, but I had driven most of this feud out of my mind before... You should know the setup, but for those who forget - the big blue cage and the HiaC are set up. In between the cell and the ring, there's attack dogs. First one to escape wins. Snow won't let Bossman into the cage, which is good, as HERE COMES THE DOGS. BBM eventually does get up, and they do a small brawl on the cage as the dogs are set into position. JR notes that the match has "bowling shoe tendencies". Well, DUH.
Snow hits Bossman with the obligatory weapons, but Bossman pulls out a pair of pliers, cuts a hole in the top of the cell, and then cuts Snow's ear with them. Ugh. Snow comes back with a shovel, and they trade shovel shots. Both guys are busted open, but it's maybe 0.2 Lester at the most. Bossman handcuffs Snow to the ropes and then goes for the hole in the cell, but Snow snaps the handcuffs and crotches Bossman on the ropes. Snow gives Bossman some head, then gets the F out at 11:37 to retain. I didn't expect psychology from the match, so that was a pleasant suprise, anyway. 1/4, and I half expect Russo to revive "Spin the Wheel, Make the Deal" in TNA at some point, then have the BG James-Don Harris match land on Kennel from Hell.
Chris Jericho (w/ Curtis Hughes) vs. X-Pac
WELCOME TO... PPV IS JERICHO!!! This is Jericho's first WWF pay-per-view, and he's got someone that is willing to bump cruiser-style, so this should be good. A little mat wrestling goes into Jericho dropping X-Pac into the corner, then rolling out of the way as X-Pac mounts a comeback with a Broncobuster. X-Factor attempt is countered into a Liontamer attempt, which sends Jericho out to the floor. X-Pac hits a crossbody out to the floor, which gives Mr. Hughes an excuse to make his presecnce known.
JR: "Shouldn't that be a disqualification?"
Lawler: "He's giving him a stern warning."
suuuuuuuuuuure. Back in the ring, Jericho starts working on the back as the crowd pops for something in the stands. Ah, to be there live. The crowd quiets down, and Jericho knocks down X-Pac and hits a follow-up lionsault for two. X-Pac tries what appears to be a clothesline, but misses and ends up on the apron. Jericho follows up with a dropkick, sending Pac out to the floor. X-Pac comes back with a quick kick, and dropkicks Hughes before nailing Jericho with the same. Another Broncobuster attempt gets countered into a low blow from Y2J (classic boot-to-the-groin version), and Jericho follows up with a double-arm backbreaker. X-Pac counters a Jericho climb with a superplex for two, but Jericho is PISSED and powerbombs X-Pac twice. X-Pac kicks out, then Jericho gets sent into the corner and we have the world debut of the Inverted Broncobuster! This cues Hughes, and we have the DQ at 13:04. Heel beatdown occurs, but Road Dogg makes the save. Son of a BITCH, why exactly wouldn't someone job? ***3/4.
WWF Title, Six-Pack Challenge - Big Show vs. British Bulldog vs. Kane vs. Mankind vs. Rock vs. HHH, Special Enforcer Steve Austin
Austin joins the commentary team and goes to work on his own six-pack as the match begins. First ten minutes or so is your typical four-corners match, with the notation that Mick won't attack the Rock. ROCK 'N SOCK! When they're done brawling up the aisle, Foley hits a piledriver on HHH ON THE STAIRS (HHH is God on this night), Rock's going after the Bulldog for what happened on the previous Smackdown, and heeeeeeere come the refs. They're jawing at referee Jimmy Corderas, who dared to cross the picket line to ref the match. (Hey, I'm a union guy). Rock does his Big Show impression, which draws Show in to pound the crap out of Mankind. Rock tags in, and knocks the Show down after a series of clotheslines, but HHH tags Show and the Rock greets him. As they spill to the floor, Kane takes over and Mick hits a DDT. Big Show tags himself in, and Foley takes a Tombstone from Kane, and is in position for the Chokeslam. Kane's top-rope clothesline stops THAT little flurry, and the Bulldog picks up Kane and slams him for two. HHH nails the Pedigree, Rocky clocks Hunter, and MICK TURNS OH MY GOD! Mick gets out Socko and has it locked in, but Rock counters into the Rock Bottom!
Big Show makes the save and proceeds to clean house, finishing with the Chokeslam on Foley. 1.. 2... but the striking refs pull Corderas out! A big-ass beatdown ensues, but Austin punches out a few refs and takes over in the ring. Rock gets a DDT for a two-count from Austin, then hits the Rock Bottom and People's Elbow. Big Show yanks Austin out, which gives Bulldog enough time to clock Rocky with a chair. Austin blasts Bulldog with said chair, but HHH has hit the Pedigree and it's all over but the counting. HHH gets the three at 20:25 to reclaim the title. Post-match Stunner and beer bash ensue. **** match, overall, despite being a little overbooked for my liking.
Overall: There's some underrated stuff on here, but the bad stuff is just rotten (women's match, Kennel from Hell). I'd give the show a B+ overall for three "would be **** if it weren't for the ending" matches. This would start the single greatest year for matches in WWF history, btw.
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