A Chaotic Rant: WWF Invasion 2001
-Before you start reading this be warned that this is my first rant that I did back in like November... so be warned.
-I was bored and felt like watching some wrestling and then remembered I've been promising a rant for a few weeks. So instead of going through my videos I picked a random DVD and one that has been requested for me to review as well. Anywho this was the beginning of the Invasion PPV and htis was supposed to be the super WWF vs WCW wars that you have dreamed about forever. What a dissapointment this turned into as the thing progressed as atfirst it showed promise then it became a WWF vs WWF thing it seemed, and it also had heel turns that made no sense other than for one great match That'll review on a different show.
-We're coming from Cleveland, Ohio's Gund Arena
-Original Airdate: July 22, 2001
-The Commentators for this show are Jim "By Gawd" Ross and Michael "I'm a dumbass with a goatee" Cole
-Nice little video package to open up where they use speeches from World War II. You gotta love how great WWF/E's Production has been over the year because no other company has or can top it and probably never will even though the Production crew is screwing up more lately.
-Opening Match: Mike Awesome & Lance Storm (WCW/ECW) vs Edge & Christian (WWF): I'll be a nice guy and put what company they represent next to their names. Well Storm and Awesome get screwed out of having their entrance shown for this show. Then E&C interrupt Mr. Charisma in Lance Storm. Awesome attacks to start as he pounds Christian into the corner and then starts driving his shoulders into Christian's midsection. Christian dodges getting squashed in the corner and hits a drop toe hold and then makes the tag to Edge. Awesome reverses an Irish whip into a clothesline. Tag to storm who gives Edge a shot to the ribs. Edge dodges a back elbow off the ropes and then comes back with a Flying Headscissors. Edge is whipped into the corner but blocks an attack and comes off the top with a missle dropkick. Dropkick to Awesome just for thinking about clotheslining Edge. Edge backdrops Storm over the top rope into Awesome. Christian tries to use Edge for a platform but slips over the top rope followed by a you fucked up chant from the ECW fans in the crowd. Back Breaker to Storm Gets 1. Tag to Christian Double Hip Toss on storm gets another 1 conut. Superplex from Storm is blocked as Christian gets ready to leap off and gets hung up by Awesome. Storm adds insult by throwing Christian off the apron into the security railing. Awesome whips Christian's back into the apron/guard rail a few times and then gets told off by Chioda. Tossed back in now Storm goes to work on Christian's ribs and then slings Christian sliding into the post ribs first. Tag to Awesome as a leaping elbow drop gets 2. Awesome talks trash to Edge and then scoop slams Christian down and bounces off the ropes with a Splash which gets 2. Awesome stomps at Christian and then sends him into Storm's boot as the two make a tag. Double Clothesline gets 2. Rib Breaker by Storm followed by whipping Christian into the ropes and doing the Kitchen Sink to the ribs which gets another 2 count. Christian ducks a clothesline and hits a crossbody. Tag to Awesome who nails Edge so Christian can't make the tag talk about a different use of pychology there as normally you hit the man crawlnig to make the tag. Christian's throat his dropped across the ropes. Spine buster into a rollup is broken up by Edge for 2. Flying Clothesline gets 2 as Awesome then tags back in Storm. Storm stomps away at Christian's stomach some more followed by a backbreaker. Tag to Awesome who nails the AWESOME SPLASH as I mark out as thats another Frog Splash better than RVD. Edge breaks up the pin at 2. Christian reverses a Super Awesome Bomb into a backdrop. Tag to Storm as Christian makes the hot tag to Edge who then does the typical hot tag thing in Cleaning house. At the end of the cleaning house bit Edge hits an Edge-O-Matic which gets a 2 count. Storm prevents a rollup by holding onto Awesome until Christian breaks that up. Rollup from Edge gets two Storm gets a small package as the referee is distracted and Christian turns it over to put Storm's shoulders down 1!!!!!!!!2!!!!! Storm Barely gets out of that one as the crowd really starts to get into it. Jaw Breaker by storm who tags Awesome. Edge reverses out of a double atomic drop attempt and then rolls away from a double clothesline as Christain comes off the top and takes both down with a clothesline. Edge spears Awesome for 2. After a small exchange Edge takes a Superkick from Storm and Christian knocks storm over the apron as they land outside. Cover from Awesome gets two. Awesome attempts to do a running Awesome bomb to Edge but Christian spears him as Edge lands on top and that gets the 1!!!!!!!2!!!!!!!3!!!!!!!. Great opener there as there was just some great tag wrestling and Psychology going throughout the match, but it wasn't good enough to become one of the classics or anything. Call it ***1/2.
-Vince Celebrates as Regal informs him of Stone Cold's arrival followed by Regal making his insults about Raven. I think what he's really trying to say in code is that Raven is a better wrestler than he is, but hey maybe it's just me. Vince then gives some bad Advice to Regal about the match by making a Revolutionary war reference, as Vince's confusion is really showing up lately with some of his booking calls.
-Next up is a video package recapping the Referee fight. Do I really have to review this match?
-Nick Patrick (WCW) vs Earl Hebner (WWF): Foley is your special referee as he gets stuck refereeing the wrong match twice tonight. For a Generic Theme the one they used for Patrick is pretty good, Hebner's however is just basically the same guitar riff over and over. They start off doing the Sissy thing with a weak push from Earl and a Slap from Hebner. Lots of kicking and stomping from Earl follows as he knocks Patrick inot the other corner. Earl after a while decides to pull Patrick out with Force BY GAWD and make a cover for 2. Couldn't we have ended it right there and made everyone happy, but no. Now a punch fest ensues, then some knees tot he midsection from Hebner who then gets thrown out of the ring for his troubles. Foley splits the referees up as the only entertaining part of this is the Foley Chants. More stomping from Patrick now. Now more so called hard punches from Hebner. Hebner then gets Patrick in the corner for a 10 punch. Low Blow from Patrick. Patrick Baseball slides Hebner outside as the WCW referees attacked followed by the WWF referees making the save as I say YAWN. Foley Ejects the WCW officials not to Patrick's liking. Earl then hits what looked to be a poorly done crossbody onto Patrick and lands on him for the 3 count. Foley knocks down a whiny Patrick afterwards and then gives him the SOCKO CLAW OF DOOM!!!!!!! Meh the only point in this match was to try to make this Alliance vs WWF war epic and if you judge by this match it seemed to be a failure. Anywho I've seen worse but this was pretty bad and for a 3 minute match felt like an eternity so I'll go into the negatives here. -*
-Cole and JR show the outside of the gund arena and then further pimp the main event as they recap DDP kidnapping Debrah on SD and Stone Cole chasing after him that was really a bad gimmick for DDP as DDP really only works for me as a face. They then show Debrah PMSing with Sara.
-We show a recap of the APA leading the war against the WCW Invasion to be build up for the upcoming matchup. I actually liked the idea they had behind the WWF guys attempting to protect their house. Too bad that Under Armour commercial hadn't debuted til 2 years later.
-Champions vs Champions Match: APA (WWF) vs Sean O'Haire & Chuck Paulumbo (WCW): Both teams brawl to start. APA gets a Double Spinebuster on Palumbo. Scoop slam and an Elbow drop from Bradshaw to Palumbo. Floatover Suplex gets broken up by O'haire before the ref can even make a count. Bradshaw goes to attack O'Haire but gets taken down Knocked down with clothesline. O'Haire now in starts getting in a slugfest with Bradshaw. O'Haire ducks a clothesline and nails one of his own and then pounds at Bradshaw. Bradshaw comes back with a Backsuplex (Well it's more of a side suplex). Faarooq is tagged in and knocks O'Haire around before getting a back elbow for 2. O'Haire reverses out of a back suplex and gets a low blow followed by a knee lift to the face and gets 2. Tag to Palumbo as Faarooq just basically takes an ass kickng for a little while. Faarooq ducks a clothesline and nails a shoulder dive. Bradshaw is tagged in and begins giving Palumbo a BEATDOWN. Bradshaw catches a running Crossbody in the corner and gets the pattented fallaway slam. I always mark out for that move but I do it even more if Hall does it. O'Haire gives Bradshaw a boot to the head and then the Cruel Intentions as Palumbo jumps on for the cover. 1!!!!!!2!!!!!!! Bradshaw throws a shoulder up. Bradshaw hits a DDT on Palumbo as both men are down on the mat and its back to the drawing board kids. Mediocre hot tag to Faarooq as the crowd is just dead and Faarooq knock Palumbo down a few times with hard rights and clotheslines. Nice little exchange here as Palumbo leaps away from being whipped into the corner into a waist lock which was reversed with a standing switch into a clothesline from O'Haire. Faarooq gets acquainted with the steps on the outside. Palumbo gets 2 as Faarooq throws a foot on the rope. Tag to O'haire as they double back elbow Faarooq. O'haire then pounds away at Faarooq some more before getting a knee lift for a 2 count. Faarooq gets a Desperation Spinebuster on O'Haire for good measure. Palumbo and Bradshaw are tagged in as Palumbo just gets knocked around like a dummy by Bradshaw. Powerslam gets 2. Palumbo ducks a clothesline but gets his crossbody caught. O'haire Superkicks Bradshaw allowing Palumbo to fall on top for a 2 count as Faarooq breaks it up. Palumbo and O'Haire double up on Bradshaw and send his face into the turnbuckle as Faarooq begins to attack Palumbo. O'haire attempts the Cruel Intentions but Faarooq prevents that with a kick to the midsection. Palumbo Superkicks Faarooq but then gets Clotheslined to Hell by Bradshaw and it's pretty much alls he wrote as Bradshaw gets the 1!!!!!2!!!!!!!3!!!!!!. Match was pretty dead and dull as it seemed that O'Haire and Palumbo were doing all the work, and really the wrong team went over here. This is far from O'Haire or Palumbo's best stuff as neither man has really been used correctly here as Palumbo was a tag champion with Billy gunn in a stupid Angle for a team, and O'Haire's push was axed for no reason. It's sad because in the right scenario both men are capable of **** matches. Lets call it *1/2 and be done with it.
-Meanwhile Vince brags about WWE being ahead thusfar as Jericho breaks down both companies adn calls Heyman everything he can think of. They then both Promise that WCW/ECW won't be the same again after tonight. Yeah Yeah Yeah I can't complain about 2001 for Jericho as it was his year to shine in terms of titles. Camera changes to Stephanie who just says she hates Jericho over and over as Shane tries to coach Kidman up calmly. Heyman then puts the urgency to win on top of Kidman's shoulders who basically says X Pac sucks making the crowd pop oh Foley probably coached him up on that one.
-Cruiserweight Champion vs Champion match: X-Pac (WWF) vs Billy Kidman (WCW): Seany boy is the only person on Team WWF to get booed the whole night. JR shows his stupidity of the night by saying that X-Pac on normal circumstances would be booed out of the building. Uh I hate to be the bearer of the obvious to you JR, but he was basically booed the whole time during his entrance. Hip Toss by X-Pac to start followed by a chorus of boos. Basic Cruiser style chain wrestling follows. Drop toe hold into a front Face Lock by Kidman. Shoulder Block by Kidman as he basically both men dodge each others attacks before Kidman hits a Hurricarana. Enziguri by Kidman sends Pac outside. Kidman drives X-Pacs face into the floor and then throws him back in the ring for 2. Kidman dodges a couple more attacks from X-Pac before hitting another Flying headscissors. Kidman charges at X-Pac, but gets tossed outside for his troubles. Springboard crossbody to the outside by X-Pac. Kidman moving back in drives some shoulders adn begins to flip over X-Pac but lands on his feet and gets one of X-Pac's spinning Karate kicks or whatever they're called I'm too tired to name it. Cover gets 2. Rear Chin lock applied by X-Pac. Kidman battles out just to be put into a sleeper. Kidman battles out and gets a sleeper of his own on Pac who then just gives Kidman a backsuplex as to say I have the backstage stroke you won't get the better of me pal. Kidman dodges the flipping senton off the top as both men lay around some more. Kidman knocks X-Pac down a few times before getting what looks close to the sky high which gets 2. X-Pac reverses out of the 10 punch at about 6 into a powerbomb and puts his feet ont he ropes and still gets 2. Kidman reverses a Powerbomb into a facebuster and gets 2. Kidman gets a Diving SHoulder tackle reversed off the top rop into an X Factor for 2. Bronco Buster blocked into a low blow by Kidman. Kidman then hits the Shooting Star Press for the 1!!!!!!! 2!!!!!! 3!!!!!!!. Match was a total snorefest as it was your generic Cruiserweight match and basically stayed grounded, not to mention the crowd coulda gave a damn who won. At least the right person went over here. **
-Meanwhile The Spoiled Brats and Paul Heyman celebrate with DDP.
-Torrie and Stacy basically tease all the males in the crowd by Torrie moving around her boobs and Stacy showing off her legs and ass. Hey That surely woke me up for the time being.
-Raven vs William Regal: If I remember this one right it's time to go back to sleep as Regal basically isn't the guy you want for some enjoyable wrestling anymore as he is the resthold king. Lockup to start as Raven gets Regal back into the corner and then gets turned around and Beaten down. Clothesline and Double arm Suplex by Regal as Raven then quickly bails as Regal appears to be trying to put on the Regal Stretch. Regal punches Raven for a bit. Forearm shot gets 2 as one cover isn't enough for Raven to kick out of as Regal gets 2 again and another cover gets too, and one last one for 2 as Regal finally gives up. Raven gets caught into a slingshot to the outside by Regal. Regal just alternates between slamming Raven's face onto the mat and a club to the face/chest. Raven gets a sloppy baseball slide on Regal. Raven does a russian leg sweep into the railing. Back in Raven works the midsection and then clotheslines Regal for 2. Snapmare into a rear chin lock to Regal. Regal battles out into a suplex. Cover gets two Raven drives a shoulder inot the midsection and then comes off the middle rope with a basic fist to the forehead. Regal blocks another attack and knocks Raven down to the mat. Small package by Raven gets 2. Both mean then exchange sessions of pounding each other. (My description sucks right now but I'm tired and bored typing this lol). Raven performs as The Moronic Cole calls it a Bloody Bulldog for 2. Exchange of attempted rollups as Regal ends up victor on that one adn gets 2. Another rollup gets 2. Regal drives some knees into Raven's face. Back Elbow gets 2. Even flow gets reversed into a northern lights without a bridge as Regal then just covers Raven anyways for a 2. Raven goes for a Evenflow again and gets driven into the turnbuckle. Both men collide into each other as Raven ends up outside leading the referee to check on him so that Tazz can come out and hit Regal with a Tazzplex and Raven nails the evenflow for the 3 count. Match was a total yawner as neither man really seemed to mix with one another which brutally showed throughout as alot of the moves were just plain sloppy. I'll be generous and give it a *1/2. Regal has a psycho look on his face after losing.
-Backstage Mcmahon coaches up Taker and Kane as Vince reminds Kane that he was ECW's first victim in this invasion and reminds Taker of the brutally bad DDP angle. Taker then chokes Mcmahon in the wall and promises a DDP ass kicking.
-Big Show, Billy Gunn, & Albert (WWF) vs Kanyon, Hugh Morrus, & Shawn Stasiak (WCW): I can tell just by looking at this one on paper that this one stands a chance in hell of being anything special or decent for that matter as the only one I care to see is Kanyon. Hey gotta love Show's T-Shirt in this one though, but then again the one that says The Man and points up and The Legend and points down is better. Hey Stasiak shoulda kept that theme and gimmick as he was using a redone version of Mr Perferct's which made me mark out when I first heard it. WCW attacks to start as the 3 WWF guys then gorilla Press drop the 3 of them simultaneously. Kanyon whips up on Billy Gunn in the corner as I value these precious moments when Kanyon was on TV >_> (What the guy can wrestle). Kanyon gets put on Billy's shoulders and tries to fight out but Billy falls back back first to drive him into the mat. Gunn bounces off the ropes and gets backdropped and holds on so he gets covered for 2. Then Holds onto the bridge into a backslide for 2. Gunn punches away at Kanyon and then bounces off the ropes to get clubbed in the back by Stasiak and Side Russian Leg Sweeped by Kanyon which he keeps locked on and rolls back into a flip with and comes back with a front russina legsweep on Kidman which gets 2. Tag to Stasiak who pounds away at Gunn in the corner. Neckbreaker by Gunn leads both men laying on the mat. Tag to Albert who just crushes Stasiak with an Avalanche in the corner and then gets attacked by Kanyon and Morrus. Big Show and Gunn make the save as Stasiak pounds on Albert on the inside. Albert nails his trademark Bicycle kick and knocks down Kanyon and Hugh before Baldo Bombing Stasiak for 2 as the other 2 make the save. Morrus DDT's Albert and then wisely moves Stasiak right next to the corner so he can make the tag to morrus. Albert with a Powerslam makes the tag to Billy Gunn who nails the Famasser (Rocker Dropper is a much cooler name IMO) and knocks down Kanyon and then goes for the Sleeper Neckbreaker on Morrus before Stasiak gets a reverse DDT which is enough for Morrus to make the 3 count. Big Show plays the part of Sore Loser after the match as he Chokeslams Stasiak and Morrus and gives Kanyon an Ally Oop. Match was better than I thought it'd be as it started off pretty solid with Kanyon doing the work and then was pretty entertaining with the crowd's reaction when Albert hit his first two moves and then went downhill from there, but after that it went kinda downhill and really wasn't long enough for me to give it a decent rating. *
-Backstage again Booker T and Shane O Mac get each other pumped up in what was a fun little segment with Booker's Trashtalking. Regal then tells Tajiri to go out there and kick some Bloody ass. Oh that Zany Bumbling Englishman.
-Tazz (ECW) vs Tajiri (WWF): I actually semi-marked out when Cole mentioned Heyman's Koolaid because Heyman's Koolaid was what was making Smackdown such a damn good show last year. Tazz gets the first shots in to start but that doesn't last long as Tajiri hits a spinning heel kick. Standing moonsault gets 2. Tajiri chops Tazz in the corner. Taz catches Tajiri with one of his Tazplexes. Tajiri flips out of a suplex and then gets Tazz with a Karate kicking punching combo I guess. Tazz kills that momentum with a clothesline. Quick exchange which Taz gets the upper hand on and begins pounding away at Tajiri. Tazz gets a leg scissors around Tajiri and then begins pounding on his head. Tazz chops and pounds Tajiri in the corner and then Tajiri comes back with more kicks which Tazz just trips up Tajiri into a cover for a 2 count. Armbar by Tazz Tajiri reaches the ropes quickly in pain. Tazz catches Tajiri Trying to leap frog over him outta a whip into the turnbuckle into a Spinebuster. Tazz pauses to get booed and then covers to get 2. Tajiri connects with the Handspring Elbow trick as Tazz rolls outside and Tajiri goes to attack and then gets his foot grabbed and yanked down to the mat. Tajiri is slung into the steps. Taz Taunts Tajiri while waiting for him to get back in. Tajiri then catches Tazz in the Tarantula. Tajiri Dropkicks Tazz in the face for 2. Tajiri kicks Tazz twice and then gets caught into another variation of Tazz's Tazplex. Tazz pulls Tajiri up and gets hit with THE GREEN MIST OF DOOM followed by another hard kick and the 3 count. Match was really alot of punching a kicking. *
-Meanwhile Goofy hair now known as Paint Boy talks with Matt about his match with RVD. Matt then convieniently gets nailed with a chairshot from RVD, as Jeff dodges and RVD tell Jeff that hes next.
-Bob Holly is shown at WWF New York signing autographs as that one anonymous dude who's only TV time off and on during the year was wearing a WCW shirt and Holly rips it off as the poor guy is shown like a sissy on TV by the way he runs off.
-WWF Hardcore Championship Match: Rob Van Dam (ECW) vs Jeff Hardy (c) (WWF): Honestly I think that this match coulda had been better than it was if Foley had been assigned to referee this match, but maybe it's just me. Hardy attacks to start as both men pull a page out of about every ECW match and just do a little showcase exchage followed by a pause and an applause from the fans in this case the exchange was 95% of both men's arsenal and that is flips. Rob Pauses to taunt and Jeff then dropkciks him in the back for it (which is what Jerry Lynn shoulda done in all his matches against Rob in ECW and that is beat the shit out of him. I have yet to see a really good RVD vs Lynn match BTW). Hardy stomps at RVD in the corner and then whips him and gets back elbowed. Hardy dodges RVD's attack and again dropkicks him in the back of the head cover gets 2. Van Dam attempts to do the Monkey flip to Hardy, but Jeff dropkicks into RVD's legs and gets a 2 count. Jeff quickly stops an attack from RVD with an atomic drop. RVD ducks a crossbody and hits a standing moonsault and of course pauses to do some more taunting and then covers for 2. Double Underhook into what looks almost like a piledriver followed by the rolling thunder gets 2. Rob pounds away at Hardy. RVD then ends up on the top turnbuckle as Jeff pushes him off making him land throat first on the security barricade. Jeff nails Van Dam with a baseball slide. Jeff tries to do his little catwalk on the barricade thing, but RVD meets him there with a clothesline as both men slip off. They duel it out amongst the crowd as Jeff reverses an irish whip into one of his own and sends RVD into another railing. RVD then boots Jeff Hardy adn uses the barricade to moonsault onto Hardy. Cover gets 2. Rob pauses to get himself over at all costs some more. RVD then brings Hardy back near the ring and hangs him up on the barricade as he does his little 180 dropkick bit to Hardy off the railing. Another pinfall gets 2. RVD tosses Hardy back in and then walks around to take a bow to all the chanting fans. Jeff drives the shoulder into RVD as he steps on the apron and sunset flips him onto the floor on the outside as that made a rather loud thud partly due to RVD struggling to keep his balance before the move. Cue the Holy Shit chants from the fans. Jeff then pulls out none other than a ladder match oh and not any Ladder a BY GAWD 20 Foot ladder (Actually using the JR references is growing fun). Like you expected me to say any other weapon anyways. Jeff Climbs up on the ladder as RVD makes his way back into the ring RVD then pushes The Ladder over sending Jeff Hardy flying midway to the entrance and cueing even more Holy Chants. RVD brings a chair over to where Hardy is and gets hit in the face with the ladder. Jeff hit's RVD with the chair once in the back and then stomps at RVD as the two move close to the top of the entrance ramp. Jeff then taunts talks trash to rob before getting a Vandaminator for his troubles as he falls off the ramp to the pit in the middle below. Rob moves Hardy closer to the ring before leg dropping him and then covering him for 2. RVD pounds Jeff down into a corner as Jeff begins to bleed. RVD then runs around with the chair before Dropkicking it in Hardy's face, but Hardy has enough whits about him to apparently throw his knees up when Rob does the split legged moonsault. DDT from Hardy Get's 2. German Suplex from Jeff then gets 2. Jeff gets his Jaw Breaker on RVD. Rob rolls away from the Swanton and then lays the Hardcore title ontop of Jeff Hardy for the added effect as he leaps onto the turnbuckle and it's pretty obvious what's next as he hits the ***** Frog Splash for the 3 count and the Hardcore title. RVD then throws his own one man party afterwards as he even licks his thumbs for the taunt. First couple times you watch this match you are actually entertained and wanna go about **** with it, but after you've seen it a few times like I have you know there was too much taunting on Robs part and the match wasn't all that great as I was going to give it *** but I'll be generous to the 5 or so of you who actually mark for these two men (Even though both men still really suck) and give it ***1/4.
Continued
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