Burning Hammer DVD Review #4

CellJr300 On

XPW: Freefall 2002
February 23, 2002

--Taped from Los Angeles, CA

--Your hosts are the always annoying Kris Kloss & Chico Rivera

--"Evan Karagias (W/Kevin Kleinrock) V. Psicosis. Psicosis hits a nice facebuster. Karagias does a nice German Suplex. Psicosis almost kills Karagias with a sloppy slingshot Legdrop to the outside. Psicosis gets the pin at 7:24 with a top-rope Legdrop. 3/4* Sloppy, boring, tedious match, and it pains me to see Psicosis wrestling in bad matches like this.

--Scott Snott V. Vinnie Massaro. Massaro nails Snott with a vicious Saito Suplex. Massaro gets the pin at 5:08 with a Viagra Driver. DUD This wasn't good at all.

--I'm thinking the disclaimer XPW uses at the start of the actual show could also pertain to their more adult products, because Lord knows some of those positions look mighty dangerous, and sure as hell shouldn't be tried at home.

--XPW Television Championship, Gauntlet Match: Angel II V. Kaos (W/GQ Money). Angel's gimmick of the Hardcore Homo sure set the world on fire, didn't it! Kaos' gimmick of wrestling the entire match with the title belt on is pretty cool. Kaos catches Angel coming off the top-rope with a Powerslam. Kaos hits a nice Death Valley Driver for 2. Angel badly screws up a slingshot Legdrop. Kaos gets the pin at 4:25 with a vicious looking Piledriver. ** Started off good, but got real sloppy near the end.

--XPW Television Championship, Gauntlet Match: Chris Hamrick V. Kaos (W/GQ Money). Hamrick goes into total overselling mode right away, as he's flopping around for every move like it's going to kill him. Hamrick hits a springboard Dropkick onto a chair on Kaos' head from halfway across the ring, but bad camera work clearly shows he barely makes any contact. Hamrick hits a terrible looking Superplex. Kaos gets the pin at 6:35 aired with a top-rope DDT to counter a Superplex attempt. NO RATING Match was clipped all to hell. Kaos looked good in the first match, but he looked terrible in this match, and Hamrick looked even worse.

--XPW Heavyweight Championship Match: GQ Money V. Johnny Webb (W/Rob Black). GQ gets a Tomikaze off the top-rope, which is important because it's about the only move that either man hits cleanly the whole match. Webb gets the tap out at 5:06 with a Cobra Clutch, or at least I think he gets the tap out, because the ref never acknowledges it, and we cut to the next match right away. -*** A horrendous match, every move they did in this match looked like shit.

--XPW King Of The Death Match Championship, Death Match: Sandman V. Supreme. We get really bad promos from both guys before the match. Supreme is apparently such a badass that he wears a t-shirt underneath his singlet for a death match. 5 1/2 minutes into the match Supreme hits the first wrestling move with a Belly-To-Belly Suplex. Sandman gets the pin and the title at 7:00 after Webb, GQ, & Kaos give Supreme a triple team 3D through a bed of glass. -* Brutal, Brutal match. I can't stand death matches, but this one was especially bad with about 3 actual wrestling moves used the entire match and no real death match spots either.

--Buck Naked Lumberjack Match: Lizzy Borden (W/Rob Black) V. Veronica Caine. Black manages to make this DVD even worse by talking before the match. Borden spends the entire match trying to hold her shirt on because her bra broke, and then the lights go out and come back on with Caine apparently naked (we never actually see if she is naked) at 4:52 to make Borden the winner. DUD For a promotion that's supposed to be hardcore, they sure look like a bunch of pussies when they run stupid rip-off angles like this one. After the match they play a video clip of both Borden and Caine getting naked, which begs me to ask why they forced me to suffer through that clusterfuck of a match in the first place.

--Scaffold Match: New Jack V. Vic Grimes. Something must be wrong with my hearing, because one of my friends claims he heard Kloss say that the crowd was in "Hushed silence, sitting on the edge of their seats with anticipation." I heard him say that the crowd was in "Hushed silence, because they know this match is going to suck every kind of ass." There isn't a thing that happens in this match that's worth talking about. Jack gets the win at 10:35 when he pushes Grimes off a 40-foot scaffold and through 6 stacked tables in the ring. -** Terrible match, and Grimes still sucks, no matter how many ridiculously stupid bumps he takes.

--Final Flash: This sucks. Plain and simple, this is brutally bad. The only possible redeeming factor is Borden/Caine getting naked in the video clip, but I've seen them do much more in porno, so that doesn't do much for me.

Not recommended, stay away, stay far away."

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